Ith No Mythtory.

Toyah Willcox, her of the extravagantly coloured hair, gained her Punk Queen moniker by famously singing the now classic ‘It’s A Mystery,’ that accentuated her distinctive lisp.

However, long before the single’s release (well, technically it was a four track EP) we in the Bank of Scotland were no strangers to the concept of a ‘mythtory.’

Everyone will have experienced one of these – most likely within their first few years of joining The Bank: stories that have been told so many times before that fact eventually blends into fiction and results in a highly exaggerated tale we all want to believe, but know in all likelihood  is just another example of ‘mythtory.’

You know the kind of story. Like the official who went to the aid of a new teller, who was involved in a heated debate with a customer:
“I keep trying to explain we don’t do that here, but he is most insistent,” says the teller to the official.
“I’ve told him he will have to go to the local farm for that amount,” he continues.
“Eh?! What are you talking about?” says the embarrassed and exasperated official.
“Mr Smith here says he wants a hundred pounds of potatoes.”
“Oh boy, have you a lot to learn,” thought the official.

We so much want this to be true, don’t we?

 

 

But here’s one I know to be fact, because it really did happen at my second branch, Kessington, Bearsden.

An elderly lady approached the counter and presented the teller with a withdrawal slip that she’d presumably prepared at home to save her time in the branch. The teller duly checked the slip and instantly noticed she’d completed the details on pencil.
“I’m sorry, Mrs Jones, I can’t accept this withdrawal. Would you like to ink it over, please?”
The lady took the slip over to a writing desk (remember them?) and sat staring at the piece of paper for several minutes. She then, somewhat nervously, approached the teller a second time.
“I’ve thought it over, son – and I still want the money..”

Ah, bless!